https://docs.google.com/file/d/0B75M_OtHJ-QUbFlhWkRHNGNaZGM/edit
Saturday, January 12, 2013
Monday, January 7, 2013
really funny meanings
CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!
MARRIAGE:
It’s an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor’s degree and a woman gains her master’s.
CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees in the end.
SMILE:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight!
YAWN:
The only opportunity some married men
ever get to open their mouths.
EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their mistakes.
DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
OPTIMIST:
A person who, while falling from the EIFFEL TOWER, says midway:
“SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!”
BOSS:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence afterward.
DOCTOR:
A person who kills your ills with pills and later with his bills…
CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!
MARRIAGE:
It’s an agreement wherein a man loses his bachelor’s degree and a woman gains her master’s.
CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees in the end.
SMILE:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight!
YAWN:
The only opportunity some married men
ever get to open their mouths.
EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their mistakes.
DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.
OPTIMIST:
A person who, while falling from the EIFFEL TOWER, says midway:
“SEE I AM NOT INJURED YET!”
BOSS:
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.
POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence afterward.
DOCTOR:
A person who kills your ills with pills and later with his bills…
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Friday, January 4, 2013
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Dr. Abdul Kalam's Speech in Hyderabad
Hi,
Greetings for the day...
Here is an article on the speech of Dr. Abdul Kalam received
from another mailing list.
This article is not only inspiring but has the power to change
one. I request each member to go through this mail spending a few
minutes of yours and to shape your mind to reach a BETTER---BEST
INDIA...
Dr. Abdul Kalam's Speech in Hyderabad
*Please read this article by giving 10 minutes from your busy life.
Really good.... ** *
* The President of India DR. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam 's Speech in Hyderabad . *
Why is the media here so negative?
Why are we in India so embarrassed to recognize our own strengths, our
achievements? We are such a great nation. We have so many amazing
success stories but we refuse acknowledge them--- Why?
We are the first in milk production.
We are number one in Remote sensing satellites.
We are the second largest producer of wheat.
We are the second largest producer of rice.
Look at Dr. Sudarshan , he has transferred the tribal village into a
self-sustaining, self-driving unit.
There are millions of such achievements but our media is only obsessed
in the bad news and failures and disasters.
I was in Tel Aviv once and I was reading the Israeli newspaper. It was
the day after a lot of attacks and bombardments and deaths had taken
place. The Hamas had struck. But the front page of the newspaper had
the picture of a Jewish gentleman who in five years had transformed
his desert into an orchid and a granary. It was this inspiring picture
that everyone woke up to. The gory details of killings, bombardments,
deaths, were inside in the newspaper, buried among other news.
In India we only read about death, sickness, terrorism, crime.
Why are we so NEGATIVE?
Another question: Why are we, as a nation so obsessed with foreign
things? We want foreign T. Vs, we want foreign shirts. We want foreign
technology.
Why this obsession with everything imported. Do we not realize that
self-respect comes with self-reliance? I was in Hyderabad giving this
lecture,when a 14 year old girl asked me for my autograph. I asked her
what her goal in life is. She replied: I want to live in a developed
India . For her, you and I will have to build this developed India .
You must proclaim. India is not an under-developed nation; it is a
highly developed nation.
Do you have 10 minutes? Allow me to come back with a vengeance.
Got 10 minutes for your country? If yes, then read; otherwise, choice is yours.
YOU say that our government is inefficient.
YOU say that our laws are too old.
YOU say that the municipality does not pick up the garbage.
YOU say that the phones don't work, the railways are a joke,
The airline is the worst in the world, mails never reach their destination.
YOU say that our country has been fed to the dogs and is the absolute pits.
YOU say, say and say. What do YOU do about it?
Take a person on his way to Singapore . Give him a name - YOURS. Give
him aface - YOURS. YOU walk out of the airport and you are at your
International best. In Singapore you don't throw cigarette butts on
the roads or eat in the stores.... YOU are as proud of their
Underground links as they are. You pay $5 (approx. Rs. 60) to drive
through Orchard Road (equivalent of Mahim Causeway or Pedder Road )
between 5 PM and 8 PM. YOU come back to the parking lot to punch your
parking ticket if you have over stayed in a restaurant or a shopping
mall irrespective of your status identity... In Singapore you don't
say anything, DO YOU?
YOU wouldn't dare to eat in public during Ramadan, in Dubai .
YOU would not dare to go out without your head covered in Jeddah .
YOU would not dare to buy an employee of the telephone exchange in
London at 10 pounds ( Rs.650) a month to, 'see to it that my STD and
ISD calls are billed to someone else.'
YOU would not dare to speed beyond 55 mph (88 km/h) in Washington and
then tell the traffic cop,'Jaanta hai main kaun hoon (Do you know who
I am?). I am so and so's son. Take your two bucks and get lost.'
YOU wouldn't chuck an empty coconut shell anywhere other than the
garbage pail on the beaches in Australia and New
Zealand .
Why don't YOU spit Paan on the streets of Tokyo ? Why don't YOU use
examination jockeys or buy fake certificates in Boston ??? We are
still talking of the same YOU.
YOU who can respect and conform to a foreign system in other countries
but cannot in your own. You who will throw papers and cigarettes on
the road the moment you touch Indian ground. If you can be an involved
and appreciative citizen in an alien country, why cannot you be the
same here in India ?
Once in an interview, the famous Ex-municipal commissioner of Bombay ,
Mr. Tinaikar , had a point to make. 'Rich people's dogs are walked on
the streets to leave their affluent droppings all over the place,' he
said. 'And then the same people turn around to criticize and blame the
authorities for inefficiency and dirty pavements. What do they expect
the
officers to do? Go down with a broom every time their dog feels the
pressure in his bowels? In America every dog owner has to clean up
after his pet has done the job. Same in Japan . Will the Indian
citizen do that here?' He's right. We go to the polls to choose a
government and after that forfeit all responsibility.
We sit back wanting to be pampered and expect the government to do
everything for us whilst our contribution is totally negative. We
expect the government to clean up but we are not going to stop
chucking garbage all over the place nor are we going to stop to pick a
up a stray piece of paper and throw it in the bin.
We expect the railways to provide clean bathrooms but we are not going
to learn the proper use of bathrooms.
We want Indian Airlines and Air India to provide the best of food and
toiletries but we are not going to stop pilfering at the least
opportunity.
This applies even to the staff who is known not to pass on the service
to the public. When it comes to burning social issues like those
related towomen, dowry, girl child! and others, we make loud drawing
room protestations and continue to do the reverse at home. Our excuse?
'It's the whole system which has to change, how will it matter if I
alone forego my sons' rights to a dowry.' So who's going to change the
system? What does a system consist of ? Very conveniently for us it
consists of our neighbours, other households, other cities, other
communities and the government. But definitely not me and YOU.
When it comes to us actually making a positive contribution to the
system we lock ourselves along with our families into a safe cocoon
and look into the distance at countries far away and wait for a
Mr.Clean to come along & work miracles for us with a majestic sweep of
his hand or we leave the country and run away. Like lazy cowards
hounded by our fears we run to America to bask in their glory and
praise their system. When New York becomes insecure we run to England
. When England experiences unemployment, we take the next flight out
to the Gulf. When the Gulf is war struck, we demand to be rescued and
brought home by the Indian government. Everybody is out to abuse and
rape the country. Nobody thinks of feeding the system. Our conscience
is mortgaged to money.
Dear Indians, The article is highly thought inductive, calls for a
greatdeal of introspection and pricks one's conscience too.... I am
echoing J. F. Kennedy 's words to his fellow Americans to relate to
Indians.....
'ASK WHAT WE CAN DO FOR INDIA
AND DO WHAT HAS TO BE DONE TO MAKE INDIA
WHAT AMERICA AND OTHER WESTERN COUNTRIES ARE TODAY'
Lets do what India needs from us.
Forward this mail to each Indian for a change instead of sending Jokes
or junk mails.
Thank you,
Greetings for the day...
Here is an article on the speech of Dr. Abdul Kalam received
from another mailing list.
This article is not only inspiring but has the power to change
one. I request each member to go through this mail spending a few
minutes of yours and to shape your mind to reach a BETTER---BEST
INDIA...
Dr. Abdul Kalam's Speech in Hyderabad
*Please read this article by giving 10 minutes from your busy life.
Really good.... ** *
* The President of India DR. A. P. J. Abdul Kalam 's Speech in Hyderabad . *
Why is the media here so negative?
Why are we in India so embarrassed to recognize our own strengths, our
achievements? We are such a great nation. We have so many amazing
success stories but we refuse acknowledge them--- Why?
We are the first in milk production.
We are number one in Remote sensing satellites.
We are the second largest producer of wheat.
We are the second largest producer of rice.
Look at Dr. Sudarshan , he has transferred the tribal village into a
self-sustaining, self-driving unit.
There are millions of such achievements but our media is only obsessed
in the bad news and failures and disasters.
I was in Tel Aviv once and I was reading the Israeli newspaper. It was
the day after a lot of attacks and bombardments and deaths had taken
place. The Hamas had struck. But the front page of the newspaper had
the picture of a Jewish gentleman who in five years had transformed
his desert into an orchid and a granary. It was this inspiring picture
that everyone woke up to. The gory details of killings, bombardments,
deaths, were inside in the newspaper, buried among other news.
In India we only read about death, sickness, terrorism, crime.
Why are we so NEGATIVE?
Another question: Why are we, as a nation so obsessed with foreign
things? We want foreign T. Vs, we want foreign shirts. We want foreign
technology.
Why this obsession with everything imported. Do we not realize that
self-respect comes with self-reliance? I was in Hyderabad giving this
lecture,when a 14 year old girl asked me for my autograph. I asked her
what her goal in life is. She replied: I want to live in a developed
India . For her, you and I will have to build this developed India .
You must proclaim. India is not an under-developed nation; it is a
highly developed nation.
Do you have 10 minutes? Allow me to come back with a vengeance.
Got 10 minutes for your country? If yes, then read; otherwise, choice is yours.
YOU say that our government is inefficient.
YOU say that our laws are too old.
YOU say that the municipality does not pick up the garbage.
YOU say that the phones don't work, the railways are a joke,
The airline is the worst in the world, mails never reach their destination.
YOU say that our country has been fed to the dogs and is the absolute pits.
YOU say, say and say. What do YOU do about it?
Take a person on his way to Singapore . Give him a name - YOURS. Give
him aface - YOURS. YOU walk out of the airport and you are at your
International best. In Singapore you don't throw cigarette butts on
the roads or eat in the stores.... YOU are as proud of their
Underground links as they are. You pay $5 (approx. Rs. 60) to drive
through Orchard Road (equivalent of Mahim Causeway or Pedder Road )
between 5 PM and 8 PM. YOU come back to the parking lot to punch your
parking ticket if you have over stayed in a restaurant or a shopping
mall irrespective of your status identity... In Singapore you don't
say anything, DO YOU?
YOU wouldn't dare to eat in public during Ramadan, in Dubai .
YOU would not dare to go out without your head covered in Jeddah .
YOU would not dare to buy an employee of the telephone exchange in
London at 10 pounds ( Rs.650) a month to, 'see to it that my STD and
ISD calls are billed to someone else.'
YOU would not dare to speed beyond 55 mph (88 km/h) in Washington and
then tell the traffic cop,'Jaanta hai main kaun hoon (Do you know who
I am?). I am so and so's son. Take your two bucks and get lost.'
YOU wouldn't chuck an empty coconut shell anywhere other than the
garbage pail on the beaches in Australia and New
Zealand .
Why don't YOU spit Paan on the streets of Tokyo ? Why don't YOU use
examination jockeys or buy fake certificates in Boston ??? We are
still talking of the same YOU.
YOU who can respect and conform to a foreign system in other countries
but cannot in your own. You who will throw papers and cigarettes on
the road the moment you touch Indian ground. If you can be an involved
and appreciative citizen in an alien country, why cannot you be the
same here in India ?
Once in an interview, the famous Ex-municipal commissioner of Bombay ,
Mr. Tinaikar , had a point to make. 'Rich people's dogs are walked on
the streets to leave their affluent droppings all over the place,' he
said. 'And then the same people turn around to criticize and blame the
authorities for inefficiency and dirty pavements. What do they expect
the
officers to do? Go down with a broom every time their dog feels the
pressure in his bowels? In America every dog owner has to clean up
after his pet has done the job. Same in Japan . Will the Indian
citizen do that here?' He's right. We go to the polls to choose a
government and after that forfeit all responsibility.
We sit back wanting to be pampered and expect the government to do
everything for us whilst our contribution is totally negative. We
expect the government to clean up but we are not going to stop
chucking garbage all over the place nor are we going to stop to pick a
up a stray piece of paper and throw it in the bin.
We expect the railways to provide clean bathrooms but we are not going
to learn the proper use of bathrooms.
We want Indian Airlines and Air India to provide the best of food and
toiletries but we are not going to stop pilfering at the least
opportunity.
This applies even to the staff who is known not to pass on the service
to the public. When it comes to burning social issues like those
related towomen, dowry, girl child! and others, we make loud drawing
room protestations and continue to do the reverse at home. Our excuse?
'It's the whole system which has to change, how will it matter if I
alone forego my sons' rights to a dowry.' So who's going to change the
system? What does a system consist of ? Very conveniently for us it
consists of our neighbours, other households, other cities, other
communities and the government. But definitely not me and YOU.
When it comes to us actually making a positive contribution to the
system we lock ourselves along with our families into a safe cocoon
and look into the distance at countries far away and wait for a
Mr.Clean to come along & work miracles for us with a majestic sweep of
his hand or we leave the country and run away. Like lazy cowards
hounded by our fears we run to America to bask in their glory and
praise their system. When New York becomes insecure we run to England
. When England experiences unemployment, we take the next flight out
to the Gulf. When the Gulf is war struck, we demand to be rescued and
brought home by the Indian government. Everybody is out to abuse and
rape the country. Nobody thinks of feeding the system. Our conscience
is mortgaged to money.
Dear Indians, The article is highly thought inductive, calls for a
greatdeal of introspection and pricks one's conscience too.... I am
echoing J. F. Kennedy 's words to his fellow Americans to relate to
Indians.....
'ASK WHAT WE CAN DO FOR INDIA
AND DO WHAT HAS TO BE DONE TO MAKE INDIA
WHAT AMERICA AND OTHER WESTERN COUNTRIES ARE TODAY'
Lets do what India needs from us.
Forward this mail to each Indian for a change instead of sending Jokes
or junk mails.
Thank you,
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